Blessed With A Life I Never Expected

It was an October day... When they dropped you off at my house A bag of clothes and your teddy bear The day it was suddenly real. In 2015, a musical was performed on Broadway and it took the musical theater world by storm: "Dear Evan Hansen". If you haven't heard of it you should stop what you are doing (yes, even reading this) and head over to YouTube ( https://youtu.be/h9rf5wFq3zk ). Ok, now that we got that out of the way we can continue. Dear Evan Hansen is the story of Evan, a high school student who struggles with anxiety. His counselor tells him to write a letter to himself. "Dear Evan Hansen, Today is going to be a good day." He goes to school with the letter in his hand only to get it taken away by another student, Connor, who has many problems of his own. That morning when Connor and his mom, dad, and sister were all getting ready for school and he gets into an argument with his mom about going to school, all because he was high. The next day...

Just like many of my friends, I caved and on the day Disney+ was launched I signed up for a membership (shout out to my parents for my early Christmas present). For a while, I had debated on writing another blog. "What would I say? How would I tell everyone what has been going on in my life? I don't have anything good to say.... Where do I even begin to start?" All of these questions ran through my head. But when I decided to watch one of my favorite childhood movies, The Hunchback of Notre Dame, it all just clicked. In the movie, Esmeralda is a fugitive, a gypsy hiding in a church claiming sanctuary. The Priest and here are having a great conversation, Esmeralda - "What do they have against people who are different anyway?" Priest - "You can't right all the wrongs of this world by yourself." Esmeralda - "Well no one out there is going to help, that's for sure." Priest (guiding her into the main area of the church) - "Well, perha...

I knew that Little Man wouldn't be with me forever, and I don't think I really wanted him to be with me that long. But I had no idea he would impact my life the way he did. The week leading up to him going back to live with his parents I had so many emotions. I was ecstatic...I had watched his parents grow so much. They had gone from barely even making eye contact with me to talking to me each week about life and giving me a hug whenever I saw them. It was truly a beautiful thing to witness. I was terrified... How could Little Man go home? What would come next for him? Will he even remember me? Will his parents allow me to continue to be in his life? How was I going to do with a quiet house? I was nervous...I had been called Mom by this kid for 4 months....what would he call me when he saw me next...if he saw me again... All the feelings and emotions stirred in my heart daily, often times not knowing what to do when one came up. I struggled to concentrate on anything an...

"Don't be mad Mommy..." The first time he said it I began to cry almost instantly. It broke my heart. Yes, Little Man calls me Mommy. But it wasn't that that got to me...it was the look on his face. As I sat down at his feet to change his pull-up which he had pooped in probably for the 3rd time that morning, I was frustrated and was doing everything to make sure that he didn't see it. But was I mad...no. Little Man knew better...he was potty trained and regressed back to pull-ups...he knew he was supposed to poop in the toilet. But how could I be mad...not to mention it was only his first full day with me when this happened. (Side note - pray for us! We are potty training and are down to one accident a day!!) The reality is...yes I do get mad...and it happens often. When he chooses not to listen for the 5th time in a row. Or when he hits me or kicks me. Or when he runs around the apartment screaming and laughing when he is in trouble... there are many MANY tim...

Foster Care can be a scary thing. For those that work in it, for the children that are placed in it and even those that choose to say yes to it. But it can also be a beautiful gift. But why did I choose to foster? I wish it was a simple answer but it isn't...maybe it was my own past-my 3 months (I was a newborn) in foster care before I was eventually adopted...maybe it was my strong desire to be a mother...maybe it was the encouragement I received from friends and family...honestly I am not sure if I could pin point it to one good solid reason. But each of those, and many more play a role in why I decided to become a Foster Parent. When I first started contemplating it I didn't tell anyone. I had been thinking about it for a while but I figured everyone would think I was crazy and no one would support me. But one day a friend was over for dinner and we were just visiting and talking and somehow it came up in conversation. She encouraged me to look into it and said "I t...